I am writing this because my sister won't.
Some of you have been getting vocal about what you believe to be "good parenting" in what you perceive as bad parenting on my sister's part. To be fair to her and her husband you would have to acknowledge that they live very far away from most of you.
So some of the things that I need to get off my chest and place out there in the open for everyone to get an idea of what my sis and SO are going through with new baby, and the trial of first time parents are:
- When you come to visit:
- You absolutely have to:
- Changing baby. Sure it is cute, and a "once" in a lifetime chance for you. But baby isn't a doll. Besides that, will you want to change him when he is a toddler? My guess is no. So accept a no when my sister or her SO tells you politely no.
- Feed baby. Ditto to the last point. It might be cute but baby has needs that somebody who hasn't done it before can't fulfill. They are not acting out of spite like some of you have tossed about.
- They work full time, and yet they will make an effort to let you see baby. They just won't cook for you or go out to eat. If that works then you are welcome to visit. And if it is past eight in the evening forget it. That is bedtime for the whole family.
- You absolutely have to:
I know that you thought that the list would be harsh, and for some of you it might be, but these are reasonable expectations for you to respect. When you can't do that it isn't their problem.
Raising a baby is hard work, it is rewarding, and the more they get the hang of it I am sure parenting will get easier but right now they have their hands full and they would appreciate your understanding.